.Editor's Details: The complying with is the content of a character coming from Trip 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reassessing the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't created very much concerning specifics of this particular objective throughout the month I've been actually right here, generally for 2 main reasons: the 1st being that there has actually been actually incredibly little time to do that kind of writing, and furthermore, since I am actually unsure just how relaxed I am actually discussing thoughts I share with friends and family along with the rest of the world.Well, obviously the globe transformed today. What I say or even do is actually incredibly small contrasted to the importance of what happened to our nation today when it was actually assaulted through ... through whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I reckon. Difficult to understand at whom to direct our anger and concern ...I had actually simply finished a number of activities this morning, the absolute most lengthy being the physical exams of all workers members. In an exclusive talk following that, the tour plastic surgeon told me they were possessing a really poor day on the ground. I possessed no tip ...He described the circumstance to me as greatest he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually thrown for a loop, after that horrified. My first thought and feelings was that this wasn't a true talk, that I was actually still listening closely to some of my Tom Clancy strips. It just really did not seem achievable on this incrustation in our nation. I couldn't even envision the details, even just before the news of additional destruction started coming in.Vladimir came rather quickly, noticing that one thing very severe was being actually gone over. I swung Michael in to the element at the same time. They were actually likewise impressed and stunned. After we signed off, I made an effort to discuss to Vladimir and also Michael as absolute best I could possibly the potential measurement of this particular act of terror in midtown New york as well as at the Pentagon. They clearly understood as well as were very sympathetic.I glanced at the Globe Chart on the personal computer to view where over the globe our experts were actually as well as discovered that our experts were happening southeast out of Canada and will be skipping New England in a couple of minutes. I zoomed around the terminal till I found a home window that would certainly offer me a sight of New York City and got hold of the local cam. It took place to become a video camera, as well as I was actually looking south from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke seemed to possess a strange bloom to it at the base of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the urban area. After reviewing some of the news articles we just received, I feel our experts were examining NY around the amount of time of, or even quickly after, the crash of the second high rise. How awful ...I panned the camera the whole time the East Coast to the south to view if I can observe any other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, yet absolutely nothing was visible.It was rather hard to deal with job after that, though our experts possessed some to do, however on the next orbit we crossed the United States additional south. All three of us were actually working a couple of cameras to attempt to get sights of New york city or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, but no particular resource can be viewed. All of it appeared unbelievable coming from 2 to 3 hundred miles away. I can't envision the terrible settings on the ground.Besides the mental effect of our country being dealt with and also countless our people as well as possibly some friends being actually eliminated, the most frustrating feeling being actually where I am is one of solitude.Upcoming day ... I presume the tiredness and also psychological pressure obtained the best of me. I could not stay awake as well as continue to compose. Today was still hard, however we started getting additional details, plus our company had the respect of speaking straight with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, who guaranteed our company that the ground teams would certainly continue to function as well as ensure our safety and security, as well as the risk-free operation of the Place. We likewise spoke with our Manager, Mr. Goldin, that included that the partners in the System are actually all entirely dedicated to carrying on safe functions and also help. These were actually never questions for me. I recognize all these people! The ground staffs have been very encouraging, incredibly understanding of the influence of the information, and have actually made an effort to be as helpful as achievable. They have actually all been actually quite expert and concentrated though I can't envision the diversion of this kind of updates being available in and the thought that authorities properties might be at risk. They never avoided a beat, also when transferring control centers. As well as a group of senior staffs and also good friends provided us a rather detailed instruction about what was understood as well as what was actually being actually performed in the federal government as well as at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was very useful and also kind of all of them to perform in the middle of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has additionally been actually supportive as well as beneficial, attempting to uplink news articles when our very own properties were unusable, and also claiming kind words ...My crewmates have been great, too. They recognize it's been a tough day for me and also the individuals on the ground, and also they've made an effort to become as also keeled and also helpful as achievable. Michael even repaired me my beloved Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they provide me lots of room to presume when I required it. They are very sympathetic as well as naturally shocked at whoever will do this.I recognize many people in Washington, many individuals who journey to DC and New York City, numerous that are actually aviators, that I felt certain I will receive a minimum of a handful of parts of bad news over the following couple of times. I obtained the first one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that hit the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I met Chic in the course of plebe summer when our team resided in the D&B together, and also we had great deals of classes together. I can not picture what he must of looked at, and also now I hear that he might possess climbed even further than our team may even think about by potentially avoiding his aircraft coming from being actually the one to attack the White Home. What an awful loss, however I'm sure Chic was actually battling fearlessly throughout. And also tears don't flow the very same in space ...It's complicated to describe exactly how it really feels to become the only American completely off the earth at a time like this. The sensation that I ought to exist along with all of you, dealing with this, aiding in some way, is actually difficult. I know that we get on the limit (or even past) of a horrendous switch in the past history of the globe. Several things are going to certainly never be the same once again after September 11, 2001. Not merely for the thousands as well as lots of individuals directly impacted through these ghastly process of violence, however perhaps for we all. Our experts will definitely find our own selves really feeling differently regarding lots of factors, including perhaps room exploration, regrettably.It's terrible to observe smoke pouring coming from cuts in your personal country from such a wonderful point of view. The duality of getting on a space probe committed to strengthening life on the earth as well as enjoying life being ruined by such intentional, awful acts is jolting to the subconscious, regardless of that you are actually. As well as the understanding that whatever will be various than when our company released due to the time our team land is a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our management that we will definitely carry out whatever achievable to far better safeguard her and also our family members, and also to carry justice of what has actually been actually performed. I possess confidence that the really good people at NASA will certainly perform everything required to proceed our goal safely and securely and also return our company carefully at the correct time. And I skip all of you quite. I can not be there with you personally, as well as our experts possess a long way to visit finish our mission, yet be specific that my center is actually along with you, as well as know you are in my petitions.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the final character ... The good news is, it is actually been actually an active full week up listed below. As well as to prove that, like our country, our team are continuing on our intended course with business as usual (as much as feasible). Tonight the latest add-on to the station, the Russian Docking Chamber will be actually released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States time), it will definitely dock with our team, at a port never ever made use of before on the low point side of the Solution Component. This brand new element will offer us another area to dock a Progression or Soyuz as well as will definitely offer a huge airlock along with 2 able to be used hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan meets, which we are going to do a few of before our company come home.The complication before in managing this week was actually insufficient information. The problem now is a lot of. It arrived at one time when e-mail was restored, as well as there is actually insufficient time to review all of it! Plus it is actually as well challenging to deal with all of it at the same time. However I enjoy obtaining it, and I actually enjoy the excellent characters of help and also friendly relationship I am getting.Our company are flourishing on board, obtaining our job carried out, as well as talking about traits. Last evening our team had a long dialogue over dinner about the significance of these activities, the achievable activities to observe, as well as what must be performed. After supper, Michael challenged telling me that every e-mail he got from good friends in Russia stated specifically to inform me just how regretful they were actually that this happened, prolonging their condolences, as well as asking just how I was actually performing. Vladimir taught me the Russian term for "acknowledgements" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Area. (Both the Russian and the English words are considerably extremely lengthy to verbalize simply.) Incredibly type folks.For the final 2 times, the Russian MCC has sufficed to send live broadcasts of radio news about the event and connected tales, to make sure I was actually well informed. Every specialist that has actually come on the line to discuss a technique or even a problem contends some aspect stretched greetings to me with kind phrases. Tonight the Russian capcom told our company that as a result of the wedding day of remembrance in the US, all the time people had been delivering florals as well as lining all the wall surfaces of the United States consulate in Moscow, as well as this evening they were igniting candle lights in the street outside the embassy. How the planet has modified.People everywhere seem to be to realize the senselessness as well as scary in this particular assault. And also the incredible reduction. Moscow has actually taken care of these type of issues in the final couple of years with condo as well as train battles, so they are as anxious to do away with this threat as our team are. However all-time low collection is that there are great individuals almost everywhere that intend to live in calmness. I read that a little one inquired, "America is so great to various other countries, we constantly aid everybody, just how can they hate our team a lot?".I really hope the example of participation and also count on that this space capsule plus all people in the course demonstrate daily are going to at some point inspire the remainder of the globe to operate similarly. They must!Unfortunately, our team will not be taking flight over the United States during the time people are actually lighting candlesticks. Don't understand if our team could possibly find that anyway. We did, having said that, find a really unique and wonderful attraction a handful of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Chamber on a Soyuz enhancer. We were eclipsing it as well as it appeared regarding three minutes after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunlight hit our station, so it was still unaware. It appeared like a huge comet along with a right, large rear silhouetted against the dark earth underneath. In spite of some bad illumination for some time as the sun reached our home window at a low perspective, I dealt with some video of it as first our experts passed the spacecraft, and then watched it start to catch up as it gained altitude and speed. I shot until primary motor deadline and enhancer splitting up happened just as our experts came close to sunup on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable sight in an unforgettable full week ...Life happens, also in space. Our team are actually listed here to keep ... Frank.